Tigers major in freshman philosophy

Published 6:00 pm Wednesday, September 27, 2017

I’m not sure, really, who came up with the formula.

And I doubt it’s foolproof.

Some even claim it’s an old wive’s tale.

But somehow it got to be widely accepted as fact in coaching circles well before fake news became a thing.

It probably predates the internet.

So there must be something to it.

But some football coach, in a fit of chin-rubbing wisdom, once remarked, with some pronounced authority, that: You will lose one (1) game for every freshman you start during the course of a season.

If there’s anything to it — and I could go either way on this — then that’s not good news for LSU.

The Tigers are an unimpressive, somewhat unsettling 3-1 at the moment and — if there’s anything to this formula — have only two more victories left in them this entire season.

Let that sink in. Better enjoy (maybe) the Troy game this Saturday. And that’s assuming the Tigers don’t add another true freshman starter.

Yes, LSU has already started seven (7) true freshmen.

There’s more.

Versions of the theorem that I’ve found don’t mention if redshirt freshmen are exempt from the formula. If they’re not, you can throw in a couple or three more … and, voilà, the Tigers have already won their last game, at least for this season.

Perhaps they even defied some odds to do that.

But maybe it’s not infallible.

Or maybe LSU could appear before the college football high tribunal and appeal some of the freshmen sanctions.

They’re not starting seven true freshmen every game. Or even any single game (thus far, but stay tuned).

But the formula doesn’t differentiate. It’s cumulative.

Still, there have been some extenuating circumstances where maybe the Tigers could appeal to get a waiver or a continuance or some other legal-like term for some relief.

The Tigers started the season opener with four true freshmen, the most of any team in the country. It equaled the total number of true freshmen who’d started an LSU season opener in the previous 16 seasons. But some were due to the usual summer hijinks, which begat a corresponding rash of one-game suspensions for veterans who should have known better.

Whether you get a pass for covering for a knucklehead would be up to the committee to decide.

There was also the matter of fullback/tight end/whatever-LSU-is calling-that-thing-these-days Tory Carter. 

The only way he starts last week is if LSU starts the game with its offense on the Syracuse 1-yard line, which is kind of what happened.

We’ll need a ruling.

There have also been a handful of injuries that opened up spots.

But the seven freshmen/seven losses does not factor in the stunt head coach Ed Orgeron pulled in the third quarter last week.

No, it didn’t involve starting a true freshman.

But throwing a true freshman quarterback, Brennan Myles, into a game that’s still very much in doubt ought to count for something on that ledger board.

Yeah, Orgeron got away with it.

And everybody likes to see the backup quarterback, particularly when the offense is struggling — yes, knee-jerk reaction, even when the quarterback position has nothing to do with the ills.

It’s a surefire crowd pleaser. But Orgeron wasn’t playing to the frustrated masses.

That moment, midway through the third quarter when Brennan was sent in to replace fifth-year senior Danny Etling, Orgeron might as well have turned to the crowd and said — insert your own Cajun gravel-grumble — “Hey, are you fools detecting a pattern here yet? Now hush up. I’m trying to enjoy my coaching honeymoon here as best I can while I still can.”

Maybe it was just in case a few in the cheap seats hadn’t noticed that, in addition to the seven starters, he’s already played 20 true freshmen.

He better still be on a honeymoon. LSU has never clearly defined that grace period, either, but it’s not a school or fan base noted for its patience, understanding or logic. You better have it written into your contract when you start throwing babes into the SEC with such reckless abandon.

Of course, he’s not really showing off or even buying time or excuses with this.

The quarterback thing was a little over the top, but for the most part all these freshmen are starters or heavy contributors because they really are the best option LSU has right now.

It was pretty well documented in the offseason that Orgeron and LSU had a lot of holes to fill.

But that was nothing new, and for the most part –—- quarterback excepted — LSU could always count on reloading rather than rebuilding 

But it should have sent alarms off in mid-August when Orgeron started talking up incoming freshmen as possible starters.

Did the Tigers think they would be immune to freshmenitis?

We’ll see.

They’re already trying to defy some odds.